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	<title>The Ducklows &#187; couples</title>
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	<link>http://theducklows.ca</link>
	<description>Paddy and Carole Ducklow - change specialists who counsel, coach, consult individuals and organizations.</description>
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		<title>40 Years &#8212; Still Surprised</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/40-years-still-surprised/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/40-years-still-surprised/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 Sep 2011 13:34:02 +0000</pubDate>
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				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1288</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In about a week, Carole and I will have been married for 40 years. We made a covenant back then in which we promised to love and obey. We’ve been fighting over that ever since and mostly in good humour. September is a time for promising. Much less glamourized than January, September is a time [...]]]></description>
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		<title>The Best Kind of Love</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/the-best-kind-of-love/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/the-best-kind-of-love/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 14 Jun 2011 04:46:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[wisdom]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1240</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Of course it is true that marriage has its seasons. Carole and I have been married for 40 years this September. She still loves me and I cannot imagine my life without her. For both of us, life has been marked with difficulty as well as grace and that means marriage has been hard at [...]]]></description>
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		<title>A Happy Synchronicity</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/a-happy-synchronicity/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/a-happy-synchronicity/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 May 2011 19:11:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[counselling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1232</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Two great thrusts and one great convergence! I have been listening to Bruno Mars and his “Doo-Wops and Hooligans.” All the while, I am writing a manual for couples in conflict. That’s not the synergy though. I also came across Susan Heitler’s “The Power of Two: Secrets to a Strong and Loving Marriage” and realized [...]]]></description>
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		<title>The Ways of a Listener</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/the-ways-of-a-listener/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/the-ways-of-a-listener/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 15 Feb 2011 17:30:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[listening]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1135</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[“I can’t speak with you right now. I am in the middle of a sentence.” “You know, you don’t have to say everything you know.” I learn great things from my client friends. The first comment came from a couple interchange that was lively, funny, heated, pointed – good conflict, in other words. The second [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Basic &#8220;To-Dos&#8221; of Marriage</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/basic-to-dos-of-marriage/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/basic-to-dos-of-marriage/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 29 Dec 2010 20:07:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wisdom]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1105</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I like this marriage list a lot. It summarizes many of the basic &#8220;to-dos&#8221; of marriage. It was written by Michelle Weiner-Davis of &#8220;Divorce Busting&#8221; fame. [See "10 Marriage New Year's Resolutions for 2011" though this is good advice for anytime.] 1)  Make relationship goal-setting a priority- before weight loss or cutting back on drinking [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Conflicted Couples: Interrupting Yourself</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-interrupting-yourself/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-interrupting-yourself/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 16 Nov 2010 19:17:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1057</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I am a big believer in apologies. This is what happens after the conflict. “I am sorry. Please forgive me. It’s my fault. Can we talk about it?” is the apology that seems to make most sense to me. But apologies don’t interrupt the conflict – they follow it. And by then a lot of [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>Conflicted Couples: Go Be Angry if You Want</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-go-be-angry-if-you-want/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-go-be-angry-if-you-want/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 17 Oct 2010 01:38:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1036</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don&#8217;t use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don&#8217;t stay angry. Don&#8217;t go to bed angry. Don&#8217;t give the devil that kind of foothold in your life.” (Ephesians 4:26-27, The Message) Do you know what? There is no need to mess with your [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Conflicted Couples: &#8220;I’m a Dirty Fighter&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-i%e2%80%99m-a-dirty-fighter/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-i%e2%80%99m-a-dirty-fighter/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 16 Oct 2010 02:06:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[counselling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1023</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I am the dirty fighter in our marriage. Carole grew up with the idea that to go to bed angry was about as sinful as it gets, whereas I figured that going to sleep in the midst of shared madness was one way to solve it – pretend it never happened. Carole would then wake [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>1950s Marriage Boing</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/1950s-marriage-boing/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/1950s-marriage-boing/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 Jul 2010 19:23:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[counselling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=959</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I have been writing a book entitled &#8220;Couple&#8217;s Journey of a Lifetime: Mentoring for Pre-marriage, Re-marriage and Early Marriage&#8221; and I came across this funny YouTube clip on 1950s premarriage counselling. Watch it and you will discover the &#8220;Cupid&#8217;s Checklist,&#8221; a &#8220;Marriage Development Board&#8221; and advice on how to keep the &#8220;boing&#8221; in your marriage. [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>Never-Ending Problems: Like Dandelions in the Grass</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/never-ending-problems-like-dandelions-in-the-grass/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/never-ending-problems-like-dandelions-in-the-grass/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 03 Jun 2010 04:47:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[problem solving]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=841</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I like solving problems – always have. I like to think triangularly, question appreciatively, figure out what has not worked before and suggest something that I think is brilliant, create a plan for real change, and measure the anticipated success. I was taught all this in grad school, some of my female friends tell me [...]]]></description>
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