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	<title>The Ducklows &#187; conflict</title>
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	<link>http://theducklows.ca</link>
	<description>Paddy and Carole Ducklow - change specialists who counsel, coach, consult individuals and organizations.</description>
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		<title>A Happy Synchronicity</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/a-happy-synchronicity/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/a-happy-synchronicity/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 May 2011 19:11:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[counselling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1232</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Two great thrusts and one great convergence! I have been listening to Bruno Mars and his “Doo-Wops and Hooligans.” All the while, I am writing a manual for couples in conflict. That’s not the synergy though. I also came across Susan Heitler’s “The Power of Two: Secrets to a Strong and Loving Marriage” and realized [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Conflicted Couples: Interrupting Yourself</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-interrupting-yourself/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-interrupting-yourself/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 16 Nov 2010 19:17:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1057</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I am a big believer in apologies. This is what happens after the conflict. “I am sorry. Please forgive me. It’s my fault. Can we talk about it?” is the apology that seems to make most sense to me. But apologies don’t interrupt the conflict – they follow it. And by then a lot of [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>Conflicted Couples: Go Be Angry if You Want</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-go-be-angry-if-you-want/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/conflicted-couples-go-be-angry-if-you-want/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 17 Oct 2010 01:38:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=1036</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don&#8217;t use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don&#8217;t stay angry. Don&#8217;t go to bed angry. Don&#8217;t give the devil that kind of foothold in your life.” (Ephesians 4:26-27, The Message) Do you know what? There is no need to mess with your [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>An Anger Parable</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/an-anger-parable/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/an-anger-parable/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 10 Jul 2010 17:24:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[counselling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=928</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[There once was a little boy who had a temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the backyard fence. The first day the boy drove 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>Never-Ending Problems: Like Dandelions in the Grass</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/never-ending-problems-like-dandelions-in-the-grass/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/never-ending-problems-like-dandelions-in-the-grass/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 03 Jun 2010 04:47:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[problem solving]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=841</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I like solving problems – always have. I like to think triangularly, question appreciatively, figure out what has not worked before and suggest something that I think is brilliant, create a plan for real change, and measure the anticipated success. I was taught all this in grad school, some of my female friends tell me [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
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		<title>Can I Trust You? (Trust Rebuilding Questions)</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/can-i-trust-you-trust-rebuilding-questions/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/can-i-trust-you-trust-rebuilding-questions/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 28 May 2010 17:15:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[questions]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=828</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[One of the privileges of listening is that you get to learn. And I get to learn lots. The other day a client told me about 4 levels of trust rebuilding when trauma has undermined a love relationship. Here are 4 questions that she uses to figure out if trust in her relationship can be [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>Love, Sex and the Male Brain</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/love-sex-and-the-male-brain/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/love-sex-and-the-male-brain/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 11 Apr 2010 12:47:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=763</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Why do men &#8220;look&#8221;? Wives almost universally hate the glance. Feeling insulted, diminished, measured according to the &#8220;vital statistics&#8221; of another seemingly more attractive woman, she worries that her spouse is unsatisfied and unfaithful. &#8220;Can&#8217;t he just want me?&#8221; she complains. The blameworthy husband responds, &#8220;What&#8217;d I do? This is how I&#8217;m wired and I [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Bombing Afghanistan Doesn’t Work</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/bombing-afghanistan-doesn%e2%80%99t-work/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/bombing-afghanistan-doesn%e2%80%99t-work/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 12 Mar 2010 01:07:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[power]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[problem solving]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=695</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Imagine that you count your personal resources &#8212; things like time, money, spirit, hope, skills, those kind of things. Consider these resources as 100%. Not that you have more or less resources than others, but what you have is your own 100%. Now imagine that you have problems – this part is not very difficult! [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>“I’m Sorry” – The Steps of an Apology</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/%e2%80%9ci%e2%80%99m-sorry%e2%80%9d-%e2%80%93-the-steps-of-an-apology/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/%e2%80%9ci%e2%80%99m-sorry%e2%80%9d-%e2%80%93-the-steps-of-an-apology/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 08 Mar 2010 18:06:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wisdom]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=690</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sometimes I feel like I am in the apology business. Helping kids make apologies to their parents (or the other way around), husbands to wives (it seems to go this way most often), organizations to individuals (e.g. when a church leadership apologizes for insensitivity to a neighbour who complains about a building project or a [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>1 Out of Every 2 Couples Divorce? No way!</title>
		<link>http://theducklows.ca/1-out-of-every-2-couples-divorce-no-way/</link>
		<comments>http://theducklows.ca/1-out-of-every-2-couples-divorce-no-way/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 20 Feb 2010 19:02:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[All Entries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[divorce]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theducklows.ca/?p=661</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I have people tell me that “1 out of every 2 couples divorce.” The tabloids say it often so you think it must be so. But it is not my experience &#8212; and I am a marital therapist who sees people who might have lots of reason to divorce (and, of course, some do). My [...]]]></description>
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